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Brian the Brain – Taobao’s Leading Robot Nightmare-Maker

 

brian-the-brain-on-taobao

What the hell is that?

Well, it’s basically an Encyclopedia interface. Instead of equipping kids with real life skills of how to use Wikipedia, the idea is to filter all that info through a non-standard keyboard and a one-line monochrome display. 

Who buys this kinda thing?

I think the primary market for this thing is confused grandparents. Gramma sees this on the back of a Reader’s Digest and decides that little Tyler here would love it. “Well, its just like those video games that he’s always playing, but this one is educational!” I hope it comes with a birdcage-style cover, because there is no way Tyler will ever fall asleep with those dead eyes constantly staring at him. 

Does China buy it?

Hell no! Zero transactions on this product. The Chinese description says that any child who sees it will have a smile in their heart. I think my Chinese character-recognition must be rusty. It’s either ‘smile’ or ‘pants-crapping terror.’ 

Not recommended. 

Brian the Brain – 1420rmb

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